its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize