your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
