Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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