Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
