I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
