I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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