Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Randomize
