Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Couch. On fire.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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