Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
