He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
