Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
