ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Who died my cat blue again?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
