I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
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