just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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