so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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