Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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