i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
