yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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