You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize