This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize