I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
