i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize