Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
farters have to be the big spoon...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Randomize
