Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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