I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
