And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
