I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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