is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
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