Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
