i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
It's never too late to be topless.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Randomize
