He asked to "fluff my boner.."
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
