from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
how does that bad decision feel?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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