totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Randomize
