can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Randomize
