Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
