Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize