This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
