just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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