So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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