dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
