he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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