is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Randomize
