My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize