awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
