Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
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