Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
