I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
