The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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