I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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