you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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