Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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