I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
